Pride, achievement and success

In my view pride has less to do with the size of an achievement than with how much it cost the person. Someone who has always been athletic feels little after finishing a five-kilometre run, but a fifty-year-old who took up jogging after a heart scare may count it among the proudest days of their life. That's why the things people mention tend to be those that looked out of reach at the start: a degree earned while working night shifts, or a first speech delivered in a foreign language. On praising children, I think it's valuable but only when it's specific. Telling a child they're clever every time they bring home a good mark can backfire, because they start avoiding anything hard in case it proves otherwise. Saying that you noticed how they kept going after getting the first three questions wrong teaches them something far more useful. That said, I don't side with those who think praise should be rationed. Young children especially need to hear that an adult is pleased with them, and a home where nothing is ever good enough produces anxiety, not excellence. As for the future, I'd expect the definition of success to broaden. My grandparents' generation measured it almost entirely by a stable job and a house, whereas many people my age rank free time and meaningful work just as highly. Money won't stop mattering, of course, but I suspect fewer people will be willing to trade their health for a title.